double OR trouble

"two is better than one"

it's a song

a phrase

but for me it goes beyond what the eyes can see

more than what words can tell

heart can feel..

for me being "two" offers no benefits to any party

so it offers no "better state" at all..

once u're "two" 

another minutes u're "one"

what left was a deep empty hole in ur heart..

and that "empty hole"

leave some sort of feelings

that's what i call

"lonely"

it's not that i blame the consequences

or hating the other party..

in fact, i'm glad that i am "one"

i'm on my own

when things are beyond my control

the answer of constant prayers is a no

i decided myself

to leave..

after some time..

when i'm totally out of the frame

became the audience of my own story

what i can say is..

i'm happy that i've made that decision

though it's true

two is better than one

doesn't mean that "one" is no better at all

its about 

taking your own sweet time

understand your life

as an individual grown-up

before taking the next step 

to own the other soul...

till then..

i choose to be one..

an empty mind

it's been a while since my last post,isn't it?

this morning gives quite a heavy rain

HIS blesses are shown in many ways,aren't they?

i guess morning fresh air is among the greatest of them

i can't resist the fresh air in the morning after the rain

the smell of the grass after raining is really a heartwarming

well it would be such a perfect time to rest for a sleepyhead like me

a thick hot blanket would sure keep me unconscious for half a day

but today i don't feel like sleeping

instead i choose to sit and leave something here

but i really have nothing to tell

i'm writing my personal here

entry by entry

as if there are people out there interested to read bout my life

i should put a "ha-ha" here, shouldn't i?

ha-ha, then.

i don't care much bout the follower(s)

i don't like to publicize my personal too

but this blog was created as my lifetime diary

for me and my future bloodline

whoever would it be, this diary would always remind them of their origin

literally remind them of me

as i suppose this global virtual world have enough space

to keep my blog alive long enough

this would be my footsteps

that i can track down whenever i want to 

the memory lane that freeze my youth

that shows what kind of person i am when i'm young

so that when i'm getting older

as i re-read my entries

i can laugh of my own stupidity

how i've wasted my youth in certain ways

or how bad my english was

ha-ha, again

i think i'm gonna stop here

this all i have in mind for now

see you later

oo by the way

saya masak mee hangus for breakfast today

haha, 3rd time

BEAUTIFOOL me Y( ' o ' ) Y

CAUTION! : this is moving towards a personal entry. i don't  mind you reading...and judging. but no force on reading. feel free to hit X button on your right.

i think u know this post is the title of my blog

yaa....i know. wrong spelling...

it's on purpose

the question is why?

the beauty is not a fool 

so does the fool..

i like the irony

and i somehow believe that beauty is fool

give it a thought

have you ever heard of sayings "everybody is beautiful in their own way"

haven't you?

"or beauty is in the eyes of the beholder"

it tries to gives meaning that everyone is beautiful..

in the way that only the eyes who see can interpret..

but believe me the eyes won't see the big dark obese lady as beautiful

you don't? well try to compare this "big  dark obese lady" with siti nurhaliza..owh i miss dato'

who is beautiful? naa....be frank

who do you think is beautiful??

see?how can people say "everybody is beautiful in their own way"

while the preference is always to the tall slim fair lady?

now that's what i mean, 

beautiful itself is not beautiful at all...

it fools...instead

well this title is applied to me..

consider that i'm not in the category of beautiful lady

i fall into a beautifool types..

and throughout this blog, u'll see the beauty and the fool of me

i like to act beauty you know....(gile perasan..haha!)

but true..since you know you're not beautiful

try to act like one...

when guys on the street looking at you...

pretending like they want to mengorat..

even you know it's absolutely because they can't bear looking at your old-fashioned clothes

who dare to wear blue shirt, extra large jeans, with red sling bag? ME!!!

that's why people looking....

like i care...huh!

another thing is,

i always act fool, even at first i don't intend to at all

you don't believe it? try this:

• i wear flat shoes. i walk only God knows how lembab i am. no wind, no holes, no rock, i stumbled and fell. always happens...
• i've blank mind.or it's full with my day dreaming. so when i walk i can't remember the way i passed through. for example; i'm in dewan kuliah and i went out to the ladies. when i came back i just have no idea where i am and where my class is! oh!
• i always act confident, act beautiful when i walk, remember? and i end up in gents or to be specific org laki punye jamban!
• i drive, i forgot to release the handbrake
• i drive to exit but actually i'm going to entrance. how can??
• i don't like strangers, i rather keep quiet than greeting people i don't know at all.but once i did, i always approach people like i already know them 10 years ago. no wonder why most people at first mistakenly think that i have feeling towards them. and it's the effort to flirt. even the woman thinks like that!

but the beauty of me is, i never care of "the eyes". because the look of the eyes is just an unfair judges. get to know people by your heart, your hand, your ears,your mouth...you'll get more than what the eyes can give.